At some point in those three years, I started tracking my migraines. It was then that I realized they were coming monthly at pretty much the same time of the month. That is probably what contributed to my thinking of them as a gravity problem. For over 40 years of my life, my menstrual cycle came on the regular. Nothing I could do (or wanted to do) about that.
I looked at other possible causes.
—In October 2020 I had my last menstrual cycle. Could my migraines have something to do with menopause?
—In February 2021, I received a new responsibility in my church. It was busy and required a lot of meetings, activities, and interactions with other humans :) The big activities coincided with the weekends my migraines tended to surface. Was stress and exhaustion contributing to my migraines?
—In June 2021, I ended up in the emergency room for overhydration. Could an electrolyte imbalance be causing my migraines?
—In August 2021 I contracted COVID-19. One of my most debilitating symptoms was a headache. I would come to call that my first migraine. Could my migraines have something to do with COVID?
I still don’t have any answers, but I have more information.
In our relationships, the reason we might want to look more closely at potential causes is so that we have more information to work with. Not so that we can cast blame—on ourselves or others. But so we can have a broader scope of insight that will help as we attempt to move forward.
—Do you have ideas about the causes of your relationship woes?
(I know each of our experiences is unique. Please don’t take the things I’m sharing as a recipe for you. What I do want you to think about is ways you can provide relief in your life. Sometimes it may be finding solutions. Other times it may be making peace with the situation. Mainly I want you to ask yourself questions that will help bring enlightenment to you for you.)
